Last month I found myself standing on a table–in heels, no less!–in founder Eliza Factor’s and Extreme Kids champion, Jason Factor’s living room, giving a speech to a small gathering of Extreme Kids & Crew supporters about how far we’ve come. I told the group–a mix of friends, community activists, staff and parents of our programs–about the impact Extreme Kids is having across New York City. As I stood up there, it occurred to me that Extreme Kids is special not just for what we do, but the way we do it. We are unique in the way we talk about how disability affects families in ways that are both incredibly difficult and incredibly rewarding. We embrace visibility, voice and agency. We acknowledge the intersectionality of disability with other identities, including race, gender and socioeconomic class. We are comfortable stepping into discomfort because we see progress there.
It felt joyful, if also a little precarious, to be up on that table, but what was even more wonderful was stepping back down into a space where I belong, among people who support one another. Extreme Kids, after all, is not just a space to be, it’s a space to belong; the sense of community I felt among the crowd in the Factor’s living room extends into the schools where we work and the places we have created community across our city.
Finding a space to belong isn’t a given. Children with disabilities, their parents, and their siblings are all more likely than their neurotypical peers to be judged, treated unfairly or discriminated against. Families at the intersection of disability, racial inequality and poverty are further excluded and vulnerable. Parents of children with disabilities spend a great deal of time navigating therapists' offices, hospitals, and schools to ensure that their children get the services they need. Many family members experience feelings of fatigue or isolation, low self-worth and depression. But Extreme Kids knows that our families don’t need to be “fixed”–they need welcoming, supportive community spaces where the whole family can build confidence, form friendships, and feel supported, whether teetering on a tabletop or simply going about their days in their own skins.
“My family found Extreme Kids & Crew at a crucial time- our oldest son had recently been diagnosed autistic and we were feeling very lost. We very quickly discovered a community of support and celebration within Extreme Kids that changed all of our lives for the better.”
-Vanessa Connelly, board chair and parent member
At Extreme Kids we strive to create the most equitable access to programs for our families. We have three locations within public schools that receive Title 1 funding: in Red Hook, Brooklyn; Ridgewood, Queens; and Morrisania in the Bronx. We have purposefully opened in historically disinvested neighborhoods where inclusive recreation programs are scarce and where services have been withheld for generations. Our goal is to continue partnering with the families who live in these neighborhoods and whose children attend our host schools, for as long as they see value in our programming.
Our programs are informed by the needs and wants of our member families. When families requested drop-off programming so they could work or attend to other family obligations, we created an after-school program. Because so many programs for autistic children are geared toward boys, we hosted My Circle of Girls, which developed into Girls Crew with the help of dedicated family members. Once our first wave of elementary schoolers entered middle school, we created Teens Crew, a once-a-month pizza party. When families told us that public activities billed as inclusive didn’t make them feel seen or welcome, we created special events such as Ice Skating with the Crew, an adaptive ice skating experience that allows families to experience the same type of experiences that neurotypical families already enjoy, but in disability-proud, welcoming settings. These programs are free and will remain free with your help.
“We love Extreme Kids and its crew and the environment of tolerance and respect of our diversities, it’s what keeps bringing us here every Saturday. Avril's extra friendly personality is cherished, understood and appreciated by our community, and we get the chance to share with other families the satisfactions and challenges of the beautiful path our children trace for us.” -Carolina Amaya, parent member
It is critical that we continue this invaluable work. You have helped create and sustain an organization that provides space for children with disabilities and their families to feel seen, heard and accepted. You, our generous supporters, have helped create something as unique as it is desperately needed. This holiday season, please stand shoulder to shoulder with us and the nearly 500 active member families of Extreme Kids & Crew to provide safe, inclusive, welcoming, disability-proud play spaces.
When you make your tax deductible gift on December 3, the first $8,000 will be matched $1 for $1! A gift from the Brooklyn Community Foundation’s Spark Prize of $5,000, and a $3,000 gift from our generous board of directors, means you have the opportunity to double the impact of your donation. To make a donation online, visit extremekidsandcrew.org/donate.
When you donate, you’re helping children with disabilities and their families build confidence, forge friendships and find community. Let’s continue this incredible work and provide more New York City families with the same sense of belonging I am so privileged to have found for myself and my family. On behalf of the staff and board of directors, I thank you, and wish you a safe and happy holiday season.
Sincerely,
Caitlin M. Cassaro, Executive Director